|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Anger - where does it come from? You can be sitting there feeling all normal and boom! - instant anger. Seeing red. And who gets the blast? Usually someone close to me, but often as not a co-worker, the paperboy, a neighbour. If you suffer from angry behavior, you are not alone. Experts estimate that millions of people have serious problems managing and keeping their anger under control. Anger can be defined as the combination of bodily tension and the view of the world as insulting, assaulting, frustrating, unfair and/or irritating. Anger is a daily experience encountered in a number of interpersonal, family, and occupational situations. It can be expressed outwardly, held in, or controlled and resolved. Expressed anger may lead to negative evaluations by others, a negative self-concept and low self-esteem, interpersonal, occupational, and family conflict, and mild to severe aggression. Anger which is held in may be related to medical conditions such as hypertension, coronary artery disease, and cancer. Anger is differentiated from annoyance, fury, rage, hostility, and the behaviors of aggression and violence. Anger is both a normal experience and a clinical disorder. Anger is a completely normal, usually healthy, human emotion. But when it gets out of control and turns destructive, it can lead to problems—problems at work, in your personal relationships, and in the overall quality of your life. And it can make you feel as though you're at the mercy of an unpredictable and powerful emotion. The Nature of Anger Anger is all emotion. It varies in intensity from mild irritation to intense fury and rage. Like other emotions, it is accompanied by physiological and biological changes; when you get angry, your heart rate and blood pressure go up, as do the levels of your energy hormones, adrenaline, and noradrenaline. Anger can be caused by both external and internal events. You could be angry at a specific person or event , or your anger could be caused by worrying or brooding about your personal problems. Memories of traumatic or enraging events can also trigger angry feelings. Expressing Anger The natural way to express anger is to respond aggressively. Anger is a natural, adaptive response to threats. A certain amount of anger, therefore, is necessary to our survival. Anger can be suppressed, and then converted or redirected. This happens when you hold in your anger. The danger in this type of response is that if it isn't allowed outward expression, your anger can turn inward—on yourself. Anger turned inward may cause hypertension, high blood pressure, or depression. Unexpressed anger can lead to passive-aggressive behavior. People who are easily angered generally have a low tolerance for frustration.What makes these people this way? A number of things. One cause may be genetic or physiological: There is evidence that some children are born irritable, touchy, and easily angered, and that these signs are present from a very early age. Another may be sociocultural. Anger is often regarded as negative; we're taught that it's all right to express anxiety, depression, or other emotions but not to express anger. As a result, we don't learn how to handle it or channel it constructively. Research has also found that family background plays a role. Typically, people who are easily angered come from families that are disruptive, chaotic, and not skilled at emotional communications. Exerpt taken from http://www.mentalhelp.net/psyhelp/chap7/ We know when we are very mad, but anger and aggression come in many forms, some quite subtle. Look inside yourself for more anger. This list (Madlow, 1972) of behaviors and verbal comments said to others or only thought to ourselves may help you uncover some resentments you were not aware of: Direct behavioral signs::
Direct verbal or cognitive signs::
Thinly veiled behavioral signs::
Thinly veiled verbal signs::
Indirect behavioral signs::
Indirect verbal signs::
Some helpful links:: Help Self Controlling the Volcano Within Controlling your anger before it controls you |